Moo mantra

So, there we are, Jim laying on the couch - me sitting in the chair next to him massaging his hands when all of a sudden...

"Mooooo.  I just moo-ed babe.  It's so relaxing.  You've got to give it a try.  It's like, so relaxing and a power word and is just a really great mantra.  Moooo....try it.  What?  You don't want to try it.  It's really so relaxing.  Maybe it doesn't work for everybody."

I knew it was coming

Since Jim has been on maintenance at the refinery I've heard that when he comes out of the towers he looks like a chimney sweep.  Usually he has cleaned himself up before I see him.

Yesterday our kids both had friends sleeping over, a brother and sister - dark skinned.

When Jim walked in the front door he passed our boy and his friend in the living room.  He then passed our girl and her friend in the kitchen.  Now, as I'm looking at him, noticing them, realizing what he looks like, I can see the many thoughts racing through his head wondering which one would be funny but not offensive.  To his credit, he says nothing....until I give him an opening.

He comes over and kisses me.  I respond, "Babe, you are black!"
The inevitable response, "Hey, I'm just trying to fit in around here."
It gave us a chuckle.

The below picture illustrates how nasty it is working in those towers.  That is his lily white chest and his soot and grease covered face.  AND - that's WITH him wearing his safety mask!  ICK!  ARGH!

Inspiring movies

Jim, "I want to see a movie where they inspire someone without football or dancing."

Me, "I'm sure we can find one."

Jim, "I doubt it.  There will be a dance-off in it somewhere."

Duck Hunting

Jim went duck hunting.  In our conversation I asked if he got any, he said yes and I asked, "Well, what are you going to do with them?"
"First I'm gonna have sex with them and eventually we'll eat them."
Luckily, neither have nor will happen.

"Black...it's the new red, white and blue."

Said in early 2008, speaking of Barack Obama.

"This chicken tastes like it died angry."

Said on Aug. 30th while eating Orange Chicken at Panda Express

By Popular Demand...

So many of you know the "almost infamous" Jim "Cornstar" Corn.
If you don't...that's okay...keep reading. He's a hell of a guy and sneaks up on you when you least expect it and says something brilliant, something hilarious, or something down right crazy. I'm never sure which it's going to be until it's said and even then I'm sometimes left wondering.

By popular demand I am creating this blog to record all things truly Corn-worthy. Now, a few people have been asking for years now for me to do this and I've decided to finally get around to it. Whether you've known Corn for 2 days or 20 years, if you have heard him say something that has made you laugh, gasp or stare dumbstruck, please feel free to contact me and I will get it on here!

Let's get started!