Things

Have you ever played the game Things?  We were just reading the cards off and having everyone answer.  I knew there would eventually be one...or twenty...that he would have a shake-my-head-in-disbelief answer for.

"Things you might complain about in hell..."

Jim says, "The strippers are fat.  You don't think they send the good ones there do you?"

Well, I hadn't actually thought about it before but now that you mention it I'll work harder not to have to go to hell.  Seriously?!

Pears

I'm peeling and cutting up pears for our toddlers when I hear this from behind me, "Ick. Pears are like retarded apples. Pears are like rotten retarded apples." Umm, I don't like pears myself but I've never thought of them as rotten or retarded. They seem perfectly healthy to me.